Locating Reality

locating reality


Clients often show up in my world wanting more of the ecstatic.  And I love that about them - and yet -  I always need to make sure that they are firmly and resolutely grounded in the art of locating reality in the 3D.

After all, the 3D is where we live.

Witchcraft, magic, sexual expansion - all these things belong to us as women. And yet also it is possible to trip a wire and end up navigating other dimensions on a daily basis. I firmly believe that we do dream the world into being, and that, as women, we have an amazing capacity to access (and therefore change) the dream.

However - we always need to come back to the dishes. Or the kids. Or time-based pressures like the month end.

Perhaps you, like me, don't have the time for skipping along with the fairies every single minute of the day?

Plus I know that the inevitable conclusion of spending too many hours in the dreamtime space, is that the trees start talking to you 24/7. Which means, frankly, that at some point you might be heading for a bipolar diagnosis.

(And none of us need that.)

LOCATING REALITY through the 9 codes of feminine power

So to help guide my clients on the path of magical expansion and increase their capacity to manifest (aka magic) I decided to lay down a clear, tried and tested path. This is the path I lead women through in my online Temple space, and where we immerse ourselves in the 9 Codes

Starting with Clarity. Grounded AF.

And what better way to get clear, than to actually learn the skills locating reality in the first place?

I made a podcast episode all about this HERE.

A Code is essentially an embodied learning, that we practice and then transmit.  (And if you want to know more about the 9 Codes you can go HERE.)

But in the meantime, if you'd like to read on, I am going to give you a really decent practice that works wonders for me with regards to keeping power and clarity in the world. 

Sound good?

we are trained out of the skill of locating reality

It is a sad truth that women seemed to be trained out of the necessary skill of locating reality practically as soon as they emerge from the womb. We are practically gaslit on a daily basis to NOT trust our feelings and intuitions. To look after and care take others always before feeling into ourselves. And there is a really massive fallout for us. Because when faced with a situation whereby someone outside of us is trying to exploit us, we are badly equipped to deal with it.

And people will try to exploit us - whether in big or small ways.

Better get prepared to deal with that, imho.

Kasia Urbaniak in her fantastic book Unbound talks about how women are taught to be confused as a way to avoid locating reality too. How confusion really becomes a default state for us. Even worse, when we are unclear or confused we play at least some part in how we often get victimised. (Not all, granted.)

The good news is, that we can practice our way out of confusion.

And I teach two ways to do this:

1. Locating reality in the external world.

2. Locating reality in our inner world.

This blog deals with the external. 

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locating reality - ask what is actually happening

So I promised you I would let you know a good practice for helping you develop the skill of locating reality. And here it is...

As women we are blessed with a spidey sense. We often know something is happening in the undercurrent of a room or conversation.

Can you remember a time when you did this?

I know I have plenty of occasions where something on the surface just did not feel right, or coherent with what I could sense in the deeper rivers of the room.

It takes courage to name that.

But naming that is how you get your power back in that moment and prevent yourself getting all squishy and going on another's ride.

Unfortunately, so people are very adept at manipulating and bringing you along with their agenda. They don't do this in a clear and friendly way, but more of a "this is the inevitable direction and you are an awful person if you don't agree."

You can stop this in its' tracks by naming the reality.

For example, I tell a story in a previous podcast  about how I named reality in the Headmaster's office and brought the meeting right back on track to 1) where it was agreed upon beforehand that we would go and 2) where I needed it to go.

There are countless other examples in my life. And I practice with one of Kasia's key phrases that go like this:

"It seems like (fill in the blank here of what you sense and believe to be real here). Is this true?"

To begin with, and if you feel you might suck at this, try it out in benign situations with people you trust.  For example, you could ask your bestie: "It seems like you said you were fine but actually you'd rather go somewhere else. Is this true? Am I right?"

It's an invitation to locate reality in a way that doesn't necessarily rock the boat of someone who is skilled at manipulating. And means that you therefore have this question as a muscle when you encounter someone much more scary. Which you will.

Honestly, I have so much fun with this question and this locating reality skill now - I wholeheartedly recommend you try it.

It has proved revolutionary in my life. Brought me back to clarity and power every time.

Let me know how you get on!



The Temple is my online membership offering that brings together women from all over the world to learn the kickass, graceful undoing that is true feminine power, and to unlearn what we have been taught thus far about our limitations as women.

Think collective spellbreaking.

Think the claiming of more, personally.

Think fun, love and online badassery..


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This post was written by Julia