Clitoris Love


attention on the clitoris

Whether it's DH Lawrence, who famously dismissed the female orgasm from the clitoris as second rate to one (he?) brought about through penetration.

Or modern culture and conditioning that leaves women obsessed with the fact they can "only" climax through stimulating their clit.

The clitoris is undervalued and poorly enjoyed. 

It has to be said however, that the humble and taken for granted clit is actually one of your best assets in the bedroom and life.

Some even give it a spiritual capacity (Nicole Daedone for example, built an entire business off the back of stroking the clit for 15 mins as a type of meditation).

Whatever your view on any of the above, sometimes I get back to basics with my content and just go all in for the pleasure ride. And today's blog is one such moment.

clitoris as powerhouse

You may already know, but your clit is the most highly enervated organ in a woman's body. So around 8000 nerve endings centre there. When you compare that to the penis, for example, that's a LOT MORE sensation in a tiny little space.

To truly appreciate this - and before I give you a bunch of ways to expand how you play with own clitoris (please feel free to skip right to the end if you just want that, dear pleasure-seeker.)

But for the rest of you? Let's have a look at the clitoris in a bit more detail.


anatomy of a clitoris

So your clitoris is actually big.

It'd amazing to think that it wasn't actually until 1998 that science revealed the true depth and shape of what was previously assumed to be a tiny bud.

In fact, your clitoris is shaped like a wishbone, with the vestibular bulbs coming down from the top of your vulva where the glans clitoridis lives, underneath the surface of your skin to the vaginal opening.

Indeed, the vestibular bulbs is why vulva stimulation can also feel so good - and also playing at the entrance of your vagina - it is literally the clit responding to your touch even down there.

If you really want to, you can actually feel the clit engorging and getting harder along its entire length and breadth as you stimulate. Likewise you can do the mirror exercise and take a peek at how the "before and after" of your vulva actually looks. It's kind of an amazing thing to know what you've got going on down there.

the many benefits of playing with your clitoris

I am not really sure that this one needs a paragraph all to itself. But let's just assume you're not convinced about the joys of having a clit. Let's see what regular clitoral play can do for you:

Firstly, hysterical women were oft prescribed clitoral stimulation as a medicine. Of course, the dubious prescription often involved the administering the orgasm form the patient's health professional.

But either way, you may know personally that sometimes the inner "tumescence" rages too hard and that a quick little climax through clitoral stimulation is enough to ground you and help you on with your day.

Secondly - the hormone oxytocin. It's proved that giving your clitoris some love and attention pays massive dividends in terms of your capacity to feelgood. Not only is your nervous system down-regulated (see point above) but the effects of oxytocin on your body are numerous. Known as the 'love hormone" it does what it says on the tin. Heart opening (and also cervix opening, and breast milk flow inducing.) Oxytocin is a hormone that gets the love to flow.

Another benefit - consistent turn on. Certainly when I am focussing on my clitoris, and definitely when my husband and I are giving my clit some attention on a regular basis, my libido, radiant turn and zest for life (and sex) returns full flood. This has always been true. But it is also true in the menopause  - which is like a revelation and a miracle all wrapped up with a bow on top.

In summary -playing with your clit will help you feel better, younger and more energised, and amplify your sex life. 

What's the downside?


Can't find one. Can you?

want more? Listen to this week's podcast about playing with your clit here

25 ways to play with your clitoris



Ways to give your clitoris a whole lot of lovin'...

In the meantime - here are some of the best:

  1. Stimulating through fabric
  2. Sitting on a machine
  3. Using a fan
  4. Circling with two fingers
  5. Stroking the length of your vulva with lube
  6. Pinching the bud gently between two fingers



The Temple is my online membership offering that brings together women from all over the world to learn the kickass, graceful undoing that is true feminine power, and to unlearn what we have been taught thus far about our limitations as women.

Think collective spellbreaking.

Think the claiming of more, personally.

Think fun, love and online badassery..


Categorised in:

This post was written by Julia